My dad taught me not to mouth-breathe by putting his fingers in my open mouth (ew), so I’m trying the same thing with Malachi but he just starts sucking on it (kinda ew)
- not tryna brag, but -
Malachi sleeps so long sometimes that I need to check if he’s still breathing. How much he sleeps is the most boooooooring thing and definitely not a brag.
I started taking a vitamin that makes my armpits smell like maple syrup??? it’s real but Chris won’t smell
Now that I’m not breastfeeding anymore, the sound of my breast pumps are the background to my life
(tmi? help)
I find pieces of granola in my bra, on my seat underneath my butt, and in my hair(?) throughout the day. It’s like a scavenger hunt, but one I can eat
I know I eventually did get pregnant but, for the record, I do not swear by fertiliTEA. I got swindled
I love Achilles so much and I want to squeeze her as hard as I love her. But then her eyeballs would pop out
I had a dream about this. Nightmare?
Malachi peed in my face while I was changing his diaper and I’m only excited that it fiiinally happened
& if that’s not love, WHAT IS. yaknow
The good part about breastfeeding every 3 hours even during the night is that I don’t sleep long enough to get morning breath.
— when I breathe in Malachi’s face he smiles, and don’t tell me that’s just a reflex
In talking to men about motherhood/breastfeeding, I’ve lost my sense of how much detail is too much? Is it an overshare to talk about my milk supply, my nips? Why am I talking to men about breastfeeding in the first place? help
Malachi smiles when I play him Sinatra, don’t TELL ME that’s just a reflex. I’m raising a baby me
Research: it’s better to have noise while a baby takes daytime naps (vs. complete silence) so it’ll be able to sleep in all environments, instead of only ideally quiet&dark ones.
Application: I play Phantom of the Opera soundtrack during nap time! If Malachi can sleep through opera’s shouting and bellowing, he can sleep through anything? Also it’s my favorite
My postpartum emotions are such that I often need to distract myself while Malachi is breastfeeding so that I don’t look in his eyes and start crying (BAWLING, really) because he’s so beautiful and I love him so much. How do girls do this every day (be so emotional)????
I was excited because I thought I had a black eye, then I scrubbed my face because I thought it might be ran mascara. Then Christopher said they’re sleepy bags under my eyes and he’s RIGHT because I took a shower and it didn’t go away. I’ve never had sleepy bags before! Being a mom is so fun, seriously
I just put my wedding rings on for the first time in 6 months and they’re tight! Not coming off without a fight!
But I’m just tired of being hit on by single men so often. Like, guys I’m married.
(jk no one has hit on me. it’s ok)
There are so many pictures of Malachi I want to take and send to everyone, but the best ones are from up close when I’m breastfeeding, with my boob in the picture, can’t send them.
(can’t I? won’t I?) I can, but I won’t. His little hands and face is kiiiiillin me (in a good way), though
Christopher started buying croissants so I started getting *what I’m calling Croissant Cramps.
- I peel the bread layer by layer and by the time it gets to the near-end, my hand is SCREAMIN pain with a cramp. It’s a Croissant Cramp and it took 30 minutes to completely go away
The name Malachi means “messenger of God.”
Cool: someone has already said to me he “wanted to know what his name means so I read his chapter in the Bible.”
3 days old and he’s already a little messenger
WELCOME, Malachi Kumar. I already love him so much it’s impossible. He’s perfect (eeeveryone says that about their kid. but I’m actually right)
