Where some (most) (all) people look forward to the weekend because they get to relax and not work, I look forward to the weekend because I get to run out mop/vacuum robot to clean the floors and the dishwasher on Sunday. 

WHO AM I NOW. 

a mama, a homemaker. hehe gross

When Christopher goes to the gym Malachi and I play a “Wo Can Scream Loudest?” game but I always win. Achilles haaaaates it hehehe

I’ve been adding to a baby name list (For boy and girl) from when we were choosing Malachi’s name for months. I’ve added maaaaybe 15 but keeping it secret from Christopher so he doesn’t know I think about this constantly. Also he’ll just tell me to stop because I’m not even pregnant yet!! But I almost broke last night and said “ What do you think about the name ___(secret!!!)___?” because I love it so much. TBD if I can hold out

I dreamed that I checked out my shopping cart on Temu, which included a pack of 200 colorful gel pens. Is this a SIGN or WHAT. I didn’t buy the pens, but I did buy a dog shirt with 2024 Donald Trump and his face on it for Achilles (no one will yell at her) (someone will pop my tires if I wore that)

We’ve entered a new era of Malachi making fart noises. I say it’s the best, I mean it’s the BEST

We just had pizza for dinner at my in law’s and I didn’t like it so I was feeding it to Malachi - “just the cheesy parts.” Turns out it was undercooked and I was feeding him JUST THE UNDERCOOKED parts hahahaha oopsie

Me, trying so hard to be efficient (~7 minute showers): I would get out, first thing brush my hair, and see bubbles (shampoo/conditioner) in the bristles. So I get back in and do another rinse.

so do I want bubbly hair or an extra $.50 in my pocket?

Can’t buy anything with $.50, anyway. take your time, girl. My showers are ~15 minutes now, proud of it.

Marriage to me recently (at night!!) looks like: retainer, glasses, bonnet.

Christopher and I wear bonnets to bed now. I won’t get over how FUNNY it is

everything about my pms symptoms are the same as my pregnancy symptoms, so I’ve through I’m pregnant 3 months in a row now. It’s a TRIP

Lying in bed at night, I can hear Malachi’s sad cry FAKE in my mind. It’s just a memory but still it makes my eyes water tears. What kind of loony am I??

Among the best feelings in my life: flushing something down the toilet and knowing it’s gone forever, can’t get it back. Q tips, paper, trash, plastic wrappers, malachintried a roll or toilet paper. The lesson: we have septic and (notes to self) that won’t WORK, Kristin, it doesn’t WORK

turns out? disposable razors are for 1-2 time use only?? but I just threw away my disposable razor of 1.5 years. hehehe oops

I’m wearing a long dress today. Now that Malachi can pull to standing, he stands next to me in the morning and eats his yogurt. BUT, HAHA, now that I’m wearing a long dress he can just wipe his yogurt mouth on my knee to clean off. I have yogurt smears and watermelon seeds on my dress from the knees down. !!

The problem with leaving dishes on the counter “because they’re his and I want to see how long it takes him to put them away” is when they’re aaactually mine that I forgot about. He was doing the same thing to me, waiting to see how long it would take. IT TOOK 3 DAYS

I almost drove off the road because I was watching a pile of grass clippings rolling across the road in my rearview mirror. Happy weekend!

I have a bunch of clothes in my closet that I hardly ever wear because I “save them for a special occasion.” But then I so rarely wear them because HAHA I HARDLY leave my house. So today I’m staying home all day (of course I am. It’s great) and wearing my special occasion Michael Jordan t shirt. Apply the same logic to Malachi, and today he’s wearing my favorite lion outfit.

happy Thursday (inside, looking fancy)!!!!

If I’m not pregnant (I’m not), how do we explain my shortness of breath, over-emotions, forgetfulness, and very clear skin? HMMmmm? clear skin is great, but everything makes me pant

I’ve called them “nips” for so long that when Christopher said the full word, nipples, it hahaha shocked me

when the reality: “nips” is more shocking than “nipples,” of course. I’ve rewired my brain to be 8 years old instead of 33

How much obsession is too much obsession with regard to my son? Malachi is 1 year old and I (still) spend majority of the day 6 inches from his face

(I’m not pregnant) but trying to think of a girl’s name for second kid is tricky because I’ll meet someone with a NOT EVEN GOOD name but a very beautiful face and I just want to replicate her(?!). so I’m text messaging Christopher really bad name suggestions, then looking at them later and only then realizing how bad they are.

does that make sense? beautiful women have always had a power on me.

some name examples I’ve texted recently: Amaka (a beautiful Nigerian woman I met at a baby shower)

Israel (a beautiful country and also could be a girls name)

Enola (“alone” spelled backward, but also a character in a movie I enjoyed)

Mila (Mila Kunis)