I made banana bread tonight, which was the first food I've cooked in literally at least 11 months. But I kept saying "SHE'S BACK IN THE KITCHEN, LADIES. SHE'S BACK" while I did to hide from Christopher the fact that I forgot to add the bananas. in banana bread. she's back, ladies
Christopher opened a coffee roasting company, which means he’s roasting coffee beans to fulfill orders from our kitchen, which means it’s sometimes very loud, which means he can’t hear me opening the Doritos bag at 2:30 every day for snack. or my crunching, which is nice. I have a secret
also, this is good[, popular] coffee! www.afterdarkroastingcompany.com
On the theme of doing things for the first time that everyone has been doing for a long time (see: fake nails):
I took my first pregnancy test today(!): peed in a cup, sunk the stick, waited for 5 minutes. Then I was bummed because it said nothing? I dipped it in the wrong way but I poured out the pee so then I had to drink lots and wait for 5 more HOURS.
hahahaha but I’m not pregnant. This isn’t how I’d announce it
I bought an at-home fake nail kit (??? who am I) and I have all my nails on, great, but the thumb nail is on my middle finger, the ring finger nail is upside down, and I superglue a piece of tissue to my index. Day 2 of the tissue piece still being there, so we'll see how long that stays on.
But, my nails are long! I am lady-like! This was worth it and fun
Christopher and I buy and share most of our food equally, but there are SOME THINGS that I know are just his and I maybe shouldn’t touch (chocolate covered pretzels, cereal, the fancy protein bars) but I find JOY in touching. I don’t like chocolate, sugar, or protein bars so it’s not much problem, but the rush of eating a handful of his cereal or the pretzels. Protein bars are gross so that’s okay. it’s just so sneaky satisfying. Christopher doesn’t read my blog don’t tell him
I just said “welcome back” to someone who is single again??? I’ve been married for almost 9 months and it’s still not second nature
(in a good way!!!! so-fun-it’s-weird way)
Wednesdays used to be my favorite days because I led a Bible study, but our friends broke up with us so we replaced Bible study night with CHIK FIL A NIGHT and I couldn’t be happier and it’s my favorite day. I just couldn’t, and it just is
When Christopher isn’t looking, I literally pick up my plate and lick it. This is my confession
I just did it with beef juice and he almost caught me. almooost but I’m sneaky
First valentines Day with a husband —
Christopher left a POP OUT card at my toothbrush, and two bars of chocolate. 70% cocoa because I mildly like the taste, and 100% because I very much like the discomfort. Marriage is the besttttt, man. I happy-cried the whole time I brushed
Because I’m 31, married, and significantly more boring than I used to be, I said “no, thanks” to a super bowl party to stay at home, take my bra off, and drink milk in front of the television
I started putting Vaseline on my face every morning and night now, and it’s my greatest kept secret, esp for wintertime. Christopher bought me a Vaseline MINI to take on our cruise. So:
a) My face is always moisturized but
b) it’s also so shiny. so shiny
I’m not the kind of wife to sweetly awaken Christopher (& Achilles) when they sleep through the alarm for work. Instead I’m lying here, praying they’re not dead and planning what I’ll do if they are. I’m just in bed next to Chris almost crying and softly panting until he wakes up
(They’re both alive don’t worry) (hahaha but what if. not funny)
There’s a smear of POOP at the top of our picture frame and everyone is denying it. Christopher is blaming it on me but I can’t even reach hahahahahahaha who did this
I’ve been listening to a looot of opera recently, and it’s just an interesting thing to have an opera song stuck in my head. I don’t have a good singing voice so I can’t even express myself
We got married more than 9 months ago but AT WHAT POINT are people going to stop asking me “how’s married life?” That’s such a weird question that I’ve answered (“it’s fun, it’s really fun”) at least 300 times? 350?
-- just like I did with all of my dates in 2017 (see: Date Me), I'm going to start a new TRADITION: making a one-block comic out of every argument Christopher and I have throughout the year. Then I'll give it to him as a Christmas present.
(making something fun out of something that sucks) (dating, now arguments with my husband) (is this healthy?)
makes me look forward to our arguments? no. it will be fun to look back on at the end of the year? maybe. standby
I've been married for almost a year now (9 months) and it's still so weird and thrilling.
- I still introduce myself as Kristin Beale sometimes
- I practically throw up of excitement when Christopher does things like schedule a date night for us. it just feels too weird and good to be real
- my instinct is still to keep stuff to myself, but I have a HUSBAND now who WANTS to hear dumb things I think about
marriage, highly recommend. it's so fun, every day. and mine is a very good cook so I don't even know how to scramble my own eggs anymore. he does it for me!! aren't we cute!!!!
I’m writing my 4th book right now (STAY TUNED. IT’S FUN) and it’s like I just discovered how to italicize. Slanted words bring so much attitude
I cut three (four? who knows!!) inches off my hair today. on my front porch, in my underwear, 35 degrees outside. Also waving to neighbors walking by like I just got out of prison. it’s ok. Christopher hasn’t seen it yet but it’s ok!!! it’s gonna be ok
