I have a strong** aversion to taking medication pills, but I’ll take 25 vitamins every morning gladly. I’m only taking 5 now, though, and Achilles is taking 2. Every time I enter the bathroom I want to swallow a vitamin

My favorite part of the day is nighttime when I can put on my pajamas and Vaseline alllll over my face. like a slime princess, all over. Try it!!

The day after* a long bike ride is the best because I can justify wearing a less cute and more comfy tshirt, sleeping past 8am, and watching tv during the day (but I don’t do this one because what even would I watch). 13.4 miles yesterday! I’m chasing the body pains

Some girls have “period underwear,” but I have Period Pajamas (my ugliest but also most comfortable pajamas) because now that I’m married it’s a waste to look cute when I’m on my period. AMIRIGHT

So Christopher knows my cycle just judging on if I wear the navy grandma shirt or not

I don’t get why women are so sensitive about being called “fat” when they’re pregnant???? I can’t wait to be fat, and not just because it’ll mean I’m pregnant. I just can’t wait to be fat

(sometimes food just SITS THERE, on my belly. I need an excuse)

I got mud on the (white cover over the) white seat of my handcycle, exactly where my butt sits. Christopher keeps saying it’s poop but it’s NOT POOP but hahaha I can’t blame him. How did the mud get there? (it’s not poop)

I clock at least 4 hours par day on Edinburgh zoo’s live penguin cam these days. I’m writing a book still so when i get stuck, i watch them on my other monitor until i think of a way forward. It’s very productive. They’re so silly

Christopher got a haircut that made me embarrassed to be wearing a T shirt that I bought in the 8th grade to dinner last night. sooo annoying. But I did still wear it and got no compliments. He got 2

Someone just told me that my wedding was more fun than their own wedding. ooooooooooooops i agree. photo as evidence

My favorite song is full 11 minutes long so ask me how I’m doing? Life is great

I bought this underwear for our wedding night @ honeymoon, but I COMPLETELY FORGOT and found them yesterday. Christopher said they would have “killed the mood” but what kind of mood are we even trying to set here? I think they’re perfect

I made banana bread tonight, which was the first food I've cooked in literally at least 11 months. But I kept saying "SHE'S BACK IN THE KITCHEN, LADIES. SHE'S BACK" while I did to hide from Christopher the fact that I forgot to add the bananas. in banana bread. she's back, ladies

Christopher opened a coffee roasting company, which means he’s roasting coffee beans to fulfill orders from our kitchen, which means it’s sometimes very loud, which means he can’t hear me opening the Doritos bag at 2:30 every day for snack. or my crunching, which is nice. I have a secret

also, this is good[, popular] coffee! www.afterdarkroastingcompany.com

On the theme of doing things for the first time that everyone has been doing for a long time (see: fake nails):

I took my first pregnancy test today(!): peed in a cup, sunk the stick, waited for 5 minutes. Then I was bummed because it said nothing? I dipped it in the wrong way but I poured out the pee so then I had to drink lots and wait for 5 more HOURS.

hahahaha but I’m not pregnant. This isn’t how I’d announce it

I bought an at-home fake nail kit (??? who am I) and I have all my nails on, great, but the thumb nail is on my middle finger, the ring finger nail is upside down, and I superglue a piece of tissue to my index. Day 2 of the tissue piece still being there, so we'll see how long that stays on.

But, my nails are long! I am lady-like! This was worth it and fun

Christopher and I buy and share most of our food equally, but there are SOME THINGS that I know are just his and I maybe shouldn’t touch (chocolate covered pretzels, cereal, the fancy protein bars) but I find JOY in touching. I don’t like chocolate, sugar, or protein bars so it’s not much problem, but the rush of eating a handful of his cereal or the pretzels. Protein bars are gross so that’s okay. it’s just so sneaky satisfying. Christopher doesn’t read my blog don’t tell him

I just said “welcome back” to someone who is single again??? I’ve been married for almost 9 months and it’s still not second nature

(in a good way!!!! so-fun-it’s-weird way)

Wednesdays used to be my favorite days because I led a Bible study, but our friends broke up with us so we replaced Bible study night with CHIK FIL A NIGHT and I couldn’t be happier and it’s my favorite day. I just couldn’t, and it just is

When Christopher isn’t looking, I literally pick up my plate and lick it. This is my confession

I just did it with beef juice and he almost caught me. almooost but I’m sneaky

First valentines Day with a husband —

Christopher left a POP OUT card at my toothbrush, and two bars of chocolate. 70% cocoa because I mildly like the taste, and 100% because I very much like the discomfort. Marriage is the besttttt, man. I happy-cried the whole time I brushed